THE paper you are holding right now may be infected with a deadly virus. You need to seal it in a Ziploc bag and call the Centers for Disease Control immediately.
This is verified by Len Goodman, a highly placed official in the United States Postal Service, who has helpfully sent out a notice to ten thousand of his closest friends and neighbors in an effort to stop the outbreak of a deadly virus. This virus will have arrived at your doorstep in the guise of a pale blue envelope bearing the insignia of The Klingerman Foundation, with the words ?A Gift for You? splashed across the front.

Such is the premise of ?The Klingerman Virus?, an email making thousands of people across the United States quake in their squeaking office chairs as they scan the contents of their inboxes. This envelope reportedly carries a Trojan horse in the form of a small sponge laden with a deadly virus that is so new and virulent that the CDC doesn?t know what to do with it. Supposedly, of the twenty-three people that have been victimized by the ?gift?, sixteen people have been hospitalized with severe dysentery and seven people have died.
The USPS has

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